Saturday, July 25, 2009

Harmonious Media Control Mechanism

Everyone knows that China has all the money. Everyone is begging great China to buy out the recession. We are doing our part to maintain harmonious society wherever society exist.

This week China bought America's Finest News Source, The Onion. Chinese like onions. We invented newspapers and onions, so why not buy the newspaper named for both inventions. Now great American newspaper is in the hands of socialists with Chinese characteristics.

All will marvel at China's achievement in newspapery! Chairman Mao, as head of the editorial department, will be a beacon of enlightenment, driving out all the foreign hostility toward China from the "news." We will be fair and balanced in our assessment of all things newsy. We will be the harmonious media control mechanism!


Jason said...

Holy crap this is hilarious! I'm glad you commented and started following my blog so I could find this and follow you back...I can tell I'm going to get lots of great reads here. Thanks!

@reply or DM me if you're on Twitter too please.

Susan said...

Do you recall an incident related to The Onion and the Chinese press several years ago? The Onion had a story about a bid by Bill Gates to buy something ridiculous: New York? Washington, D.C.? And it appeared straight in Xinhua or some other Chinese news outlet.

Maybe you could do something on China's attempt to prevent a Melbourne film festival from showing a film by or about a Uyghur (sp?) now living in the U.S. I think she is also coming to the festival. If the Chinese are attempting to do something like that in Australia, they could well already have succeeded in doing so in other countries. I can see Singapore or Japan agreeing to do it.