From Copenhagen

Chairman Mao is back from great climate debate where we debated the existence of climate in our harmonious society. We determined that it has always been an inseparable part of China and we condemn foreign imperialists trying to taking it from China.

In effortness to further maintain control of what belongs to China, we want to encourage all comrades of severe punishments for hurting our climate.

Eco-Magic

As Chairman Mao has said before, China is at the forefront of ecological conservationary environmentaltarianism. All around China, people are caring about the environment by hugging trees. The newest development in the great 5,000-year-old developing country is the ecological toilet.

Chairman Mao doesn't understand the witchcraft involved in the development of plumbing that goes somewhere, but Hu Jintao has assured me that those pipes do not pollute the mainland (but they might lead to the rebellious island off the east coast).

Let us all enjoy the magicianry of saving the environments.

The Secret to Great Tasting Fish

Many laowai thinks China is polluted. But laowai invented pollution and forced their capitalist agenda on great China. Any pollution in China is all laowai's fault--we never had any before opening and reforming brought those devils in. That's why Chairman Mao kept all laowai out of China. But China doesn't really have pollutionary problem today. We still have best tasty fish in the world. And that smell from our rivers only serves to remind us of great stinky tofu (tastes as good as it stinks).

Flower Everyone

With everyone in the world going green with China envy, the environment wants to enjoy everybody in return. When you getting in trouble, the flowers and trees will protect you. They are great guards of the motherland, striking down those with great bias against great China.

Environmentarianism

Chairman Mao says that it is the responsibility of the people to protect the environment.